The “Real Girl” Issue
The TAG “REAL GIRL” is polemic. And here you’ll find the reasons why I won’t drop it!
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Dear Pluseyes,
I only got to read your post today. Guess I’m still quite lost with the whole tumb thing. Sorry about the delay. I’d like to address the points you make at the end of your statement. You’ve said:
“you need to get your act together if you’re going to be in this game. Body acceptance cannot exist alongside
1. dieting
2. creating euphemisms for fat/chubby - why can’t your fan here be confident under the word “chubby” if it’s the exact same body you call “curvy”? There’s nothing wrong with it!
3. the “real girl” stuff. Please stop using that tag. All girls are real girls. I have reiterated this point so many times I barely have the energy to expound but… suffice to say, any dialectic which puts down another body type does not help true body acceptance.
Thanks for what you’re doing but remember to examine, examine, examine!”
Well, I most cordially have to disagree.
As I see it, dieting is NOT contrary to body acceptance at all. To accept your features does not mean you’ll automatically be happy about everything. To feel good under your skin does not mean you’ll stop exercising, making up, dressing up. You wanna feel beautiful, right? If loosing a few pounds is part of the plan, by all means do some diet. That does not mean you hate your body type. I’ll never be skinny and I’m FINE with that. But I do like my CURVES better when I’m a little lighter. This is MY opinion, about MY own body. Whay would it be wrong? It’s part of human nature the urge for change. No one is completely happy staying still.
About the “euphemisms”, again, I think it IS important to call thing by it’s right’s name. The Feminists, the African-American, the Gays – positive enforcement has a LOT to do with how you call people. “Chubby” is a negative term. It goes to big females like “babe” goes for pretty girls. It is not a compliment or an adjective. It’s a patronizing accepted way to say: “you’re fat, maybe cute, but NOT beautiful.” So, I do not like to be called “chubby”. I prefer “curvy”. I like my curves.
As you’ve seen in my blog, the girls I post are not obese. “Fat” people are, by definition, obese. So the images I blog are NOT of “fat” girls. And yes, being obese means some deep healthy and life quality issues. Besides, I personally do not find morbid obesity beautiful. As see it as an illness – the opposite of anorexia. Both very sad, devastating conditions.
Finally, I’m not dropping the “real girl” tag. And I’ve being over this so many times I’m also tired of explaining. Summarizing my previous explanations, I use “real” as in “ordinary, possible, living”. It’s quite obvious that ALL GIRS ARE REAL – even the fake images of plastic woman we see printed in magazines real – once they exist in front of our eyes. If it gets to Philosophical here it would be confusing…
But in short - and dialectically - when I tag a photo as “real girl” I’m NOT saying all the others are “not real girls”. Just as when I tag a picture as “beautiful” does not mean that everything else is “ugly”. What about the skinny, tinny “real girls”? Are they supposed to be offended? Of course NOT. I’m sure they have their flags to raise. Show me a positive enforcement blog for happy naturally skinny non anorexic girls and I’ll sure follow and support it. But it’s just not my cup of tea. Or my size of bra.
I’m a big, curvy, beautiful girl. Trying to reach out for other girls like me. I do feel a lack of social space for woman like us: not skinny, not obese, happy with our curves and aware of our sensuality. That’s what my “real girl” tag stands for.
Cheers from
Annabela
ps: I have a Master in Philosophy and work as a writer in Brazil. It’s hard for me to argue in English, so please do forgive me if I kill your language way too many times. I’m trying hard in here. ;-/
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damesyllabustphotog asked: Why do you use the tag “real girl”. I think all women are “real women”. I’ve had friends significantly smaller than I but I wouldn’t have told them they weren’t real women because they were thinner than me. I find that that tag a bit disconcerting.
Hey,
This subject keeps coming back. I suppose it would be easier to drop the tag, but I feel like discussing different points of view it’s as healthy as embracing different body types.
This link goes to my first answer:
http://bigandbetter.tumblr.com/post/712546520/real-girl
Searching for it, I’ve found this:
http://pluseyes.tumblr.com/post/711198185/im-so-glad-to-know
I have not seen this post before - and I’ll be sure to address pluseyes asap. Her blog is very cool, BTW.
Of course woman of all sizes are real. As will will see, that’s not my point. I mean “real” as in “ordinary, possible, existing”.
But by all means, do join the discussion.
I’m still not quite familiar with all Tumb things here - have already talked about it with other girls, but I’m missing the links.
Cheers from Annabela